Funny Quotes About Love and Marriage.

Do you always have to look serious while expressing your love to someone? Have you ever thought, throwing funny sayings/quotes about love to your loved one gives a whole new meaning to your relationships? Do you know by mixing your words with a little bit of humor, you can be more attractive to your partner?

Yes, you’ve heard right. There is no better way to spice up a relationship than by laughing together. This famous saying says it all-“Laugh and the world laughs with you.”

I want to help you to add spice and color to your life by sharing some of the funny quotes about love and marriage till date. I can guarantee these funny quotes about love can be a fantastic way to bring sunshine to your relationship.

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Now its time to look at some hilariously funny quotes from thinkers, celebrities, and humorists…

1. I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

Rita Rudner
Funny Quotes About Love

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2. When you’re in love, it’s the most glorious two-and-a-half days of your life.

Richard Lewis
Funny Quotes About Love

3. All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt.

Charles M. Schulz
Funny Quotes About Love

4. Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.

Jackie Mason
 Funny Quotes About Love

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5. Love is sharing your popcorn.

Charles Schultz

6. Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.

Albert Einestein

7. Marry a man your own age; as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.

Phyllis Diller

8. The brain is the most outstanding organ. It works 24/7, 365 from birth until you fall in love. 

Sophie Monroe

9. Love is a lot like a backache. It doesn’t show up on x-rays, but you know it’s there. 

George Burns
Funny Quote About Love

10. You know how people say, “you can’t live without love”? Well, oxygen is even more important. 

Dr. Gregory Houser
Funny Quote About Love

11. Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell. 

Joan Crawford
Funny Quote About Love

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12. Love is a two-way street constantly under construction.     

Carroll Bryant
Funny Quote About Love

13. A man in love is not complete until he is married. Then he is finished.

Zsa Zsa Gabor

14. An archeologist is the best husband any woman can have; the older she gets, the more interested he is in her.     

Agatha Christie
Funny Quote About Love

15. True love is like ghosts, which everyone talks about and few have seen.

Francois de la Rochefoucauld
Funny Quote About Love

16. Love is blind but marriage is a real eye-opener     

Pauline Thomason
Funny Quote About Love

17. Love is fun but, it is not going to pay the bills.     

Jessica Martin
Funny Quote About Love

18. A man falls in love through his eyes, a woman through her ears.

Les Dawson
Funny Quote About Love

19. Love is an ocean of emotions entirely surrounded by expenses.

Thomas Dewar
Funny Quote About Love

20. You can’t put a price tag on love. But if you could, I’d wait for it to go on sale.

Hussein Nishah

21. They say that love is more important than money, but have you ever tried to pay your bills with a hug?     

Funny Quote About Love

22. The more she turned right the more I turned wrong.

Mark W. Boyer

23. It’s easy to fall in love. The hard part is finding someone to catch you.

Bertrand Russell

24. Love is like a tornado, picks you up off your feet and sometimes takes half your house.

Funny Quote About Love

25. A guy knows he’s in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days.

Tim Allen

26. Love is an electric blanket with somebody else in control of the switch.

Cathy Carlyle
Funny Quote About Love

27. People should fall in love with their eyes closed.

Andy Warhol

28. Women are meant to be loved, not to be understood.

Oscar Wilde

29. Love is like an hourglass, with the heart filling up as the brain empties.”

Jules Renard

30. Women marry men hoping they will change. Men marry women hoping they will not. So each is inevitably disappointed.

Albert Einstein

31. I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met.   

Steven Wright

32. Being a good husband is like being a stand-up comic. You need 10 years before you can call yourself a beginner.

Jerry Seinfeld

33. The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.

Henry Youngman

34. As a man in a relationship, you have a choice: You can be right or you can be happy.

Ralphie May

35. The happiest marriage I can picture would be the union of a deaf man to a blind woman.


36. In love, somehow, a man’s heart is always either exceeding the speed limit, or getting parked in the wrong place.


Related: Meaningful quotes of love that will inspire you to love more.

37. What’s the best way to have your husband remember your anniversary? Get married on his birthday. 

Cindy Garner

38. By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you’ll be happy. If you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher. 


39. People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy. 

Bob Hope

40. Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow Internet service to see who they really are. 

Will Ferre

41. Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place.

Billy Crystal

42. love is a game that two can play and both win.

Eva Gabor

43. If love is the answer, could you rephrase the question?

Lilly Tomlin

Also Read: Best Love quotes of all time you must read at least once in your life.

44. A women’s head is always influenced by heart; but a man’s heart by his head.

Lady Marguerite Gardiner Blessington

45. A married couple are well suited when both partners usually feel the need for a quarrel at the same time.

Jean Rostand

46. There is a battle that goes on between men and women. Many people call it love.

Edvard Munch

47. We had a lot in common. I loved him and he loved him.

Shelley Winters

48. The key to a successful relationship is to clear your internet history.

Funny Quote About realtionship

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49. Love is the only brick that hits you on the head and gives you a smile instead of tears. 

Matshona Dhliwayo

50. love is a sweet dream and marriage is the alarm clock.

Jewish Proverb

51. Honesty is the key to a relationship. If you can fake that, you’re in.

Richard Jeni

52. A husband is what is left of the lover after the nerve has been extracted.

Helen Rowland

53. You can’t buy love, but you can pay heavily for it.

Henry Youngman

54. Get married early in the morning. That way, if it doesn’t work out, you haven’t wasted a whole day.

Mickey Rooney

55. Love is the only kind of fire which is never covered by insurance.     


56. Behind every successsful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.

Groucho Marx

57. My wife and I were happy for 20 years… then we met.

Rodney Dangerfield

58. Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing… she goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.

Henry Youngman

59. A good wife always forgives her husband when she’s wrong.

Milton Berle

60. Love doesn’t drop on you unexpectedly; you have to give off signals, sort of like an amateur radio operator.

Helen Gurley Brown

61. Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, half shut afterward.

Benjamin Franklin

62. It is impossible to love and be wise.

Francis beacon

63. Love is something sent from heaven to worry the hell out of you.

Dolly Parton

64. Love means having to say you’re sorry every fifteen minutes.

John Lennon

65. Love: a temporary insanity, curable by marriage.

Ambrose Bierce

66. The four most important words in any marriage…I’ll do the dishes.     

funny quotes on marriage

Have you enjoyed these quotes on love and marriage?

I hope you enjoyed. Please don’t forget to let me know which funny quotes about love give you the best laugh? Also, if you have anything to share, please don’t hesitate to add it in the comments below.

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